I WISH!!!!

[angelous]

granted, but it turns out Richard Simons is your dad, and my real date shows up later and we have a great time.

I wish I had a pet wolf that would never harm me or my family, but would harm my mom's current bf if he got violent.

[~/\The Dragon Writer/\~]

Granted, but you, your mom, and your pet wolf all turn into Richard Simmons, while the bf pokes you eternally with a pointy stick.

I wish I wish I hadn't killed that fish.

[xxx]

Granted, but your mom's current bf is actually a werewolf and kills the wolf instead xD

Granted, but the fish dies of cancer anyway =D

I wish I could bend space so as to travel from 'point A' to 'point B' in around no time at all.

[angelous]

granted, but you can only do it once, and its to see someone from the forum.

I wish I didn't have such a crappy life.

[stray]

Granted. You die and have a crappy death instead. ^^

I wish... for nothing.

[xxx]

Granted, but the wish-genie misinterprets that for 'anti-matter'/space and so you are showered with the absence of matter, and the absence of matter in turn swallows all the air particles and so you die ^^

I wish I died and came back to life.

[angelous]

wish granted, but now you are a slave 20 years later to an evil dictator named Asa Lambrecht (XD).

I wish to have immortality and to never look like I was getting older.

[xxx]

Granted, but you get imprisoned underground forever and thus are trapped for eternity.

I wish that the summer holidays were longer ;.;

[angelous]

granted, but now all of the schools convert to boarding schools.

I wish I was famous in a good way, and not for anything wierd like pornos.

[Zero [Axel]]

Granted. You are famous for something like Goatse or Tubgirl.

I wish the FF7 remake came out tomarrow.

[angelous]

granted, but you can never play it.

I wish for something interesting in the next post.

[~/\The Dragon Writer/\~]

Granted, but now the next person gets this crappy wish.

I wish.

[xxx]

Granted, but the makers of FF7 remake immediately delay it for another year because there was somehow R-rated content on it and the business people who were going to release it puked in disgust xP

I wish I could be not so sleepy ;.;

[Zero [Axel]]

Granted. King Kong comes in and buttsecks you and leaves with no intention of calling you back.

Granted. You fall into a coma for the rest of your life.

I wish I had an alien spaceship.

[xxx]

Granted, but they rape you.

I wish people wouldn't post so fast >.<