AWAKENING: Wicker Mori [CLOSED]

[nascent]

(OOC: The purpose of this thread is as follows. Here I'll be working with Castaway on the essentials, and eventually perhaps the advanced aspects, of RPing. My intent is to work both on the combat and non-combat skills of RP.

Although the thread says 'Closed', if anyone wants to join and can provide a good reason why then I'll consider letting one or two others in. PM me if you're interested.

The training will take on two forms: guided, and free-form. If one of my posts has an Assignment listed down near the bottom, it will have instructions on what I want you to attempt in your next post - sometimes an Assignment will take more than one post to address, however. The Assignments will usually address some skill, either of writing or RPing, so do your best. If there's no Assignment listed, just write what you see fit.

Here we go!)

SETTING MUSIC: Dive Into the Heart

Untold souls wait in silence...

Watching, listening, as if for a curtain to rise upon their lives.

Whether drama, tragedy, or comedy, every performance rests upon one central power.

You awaken to an unsettling realization: you are falling, descending through a hazy darkness that seems to be all around you. Yet... not falling, exactly. More like floating downward, descending through the gloomy dark at a gradual pace. After a while you become aware of a light below you and turn your head to see where it's coming from.

Below you is an immense pillar, covered in delicate-looking works of stained glass that shine warmly as if a light resided within the pillar itself. To your surprise, the art on top of the pillar depicts... you! Strange as it seems, the enormous stained-glass surface looks to be some manner of tribute to you, as surrounding your image are representations of those things which you value most.

Your gradual descent comes to a stop, your feet gently touching down onto the pillar. Despite looking like glass, the artistic rendering seems solid and not easily broken. How or why you came to be here, in this strange chiaroscuro-world of black skies and hallowed monoliths is unknown to you, yet as you look around you hear a voice whisper through the dark.

Every good performance needs music.

And what shall you play for us, maestro?

[[ASSIGNMENT: From your character's perspective, describe the events of her arrival into the Awakening. Try to use vivid details and "draw the reader in" to what's going on. Be sure to describe the stained glass image on the pillar, emphasizing those things your character values the most.]]

IMPORTANT CONCEPT:
An RPer's power is the same as a writer's power: the audience. Good writing is writing that gets a reader's attention; powerful writing is writing that keeps a reader's attention. Never forget that this relationship is the source of all your strength. Beauty, they say, is in the eye of the beholder.

[starcadius]

It was a very unnerving occurence. Wicker opened his eyes gasped for air, and flailed into the darkness for a second, hw did he get here then? He blinked a few time and attempted to analyse the area around him.
The first thing he noticed was that he was falling. In any normal circumstance he may have panicked but this felt strangly gentle. There was no rush of wind past his ears and he felt like he was being carried, like he was falling through syrup. The gentle and eerie nature of his descent reminded him of a funeral march. Only Wicker would be the person to start hearing a dirge and smile as he was falling through nothingness.
He closed his eyes and waited, playing music in his head and tried to sooth himself.

He opened his eyes once more, he felt a sudden warmth in the cold of the dark around him. He instinctivly looked around, and found himself staring at a collossal pillar that seemed to radiate light, and it seemed he was going to land on it. This was just getting wierder and wierder. He looked at the pillar and the light from it grew and expanded, revealing a murel of sorts. He opened his mouth in amazment. He had to be dreaming, only in his dreams could he find himself in a world with what looked like a giant memorial to him in it.
He took it in, and silently scanned over the glistening work of art in tact admiration. Wicker had been so wrapped up in admiring his image in the art piece that he failed to notice he was landing n it. He was gently placed upon the pillar, but taking him by surprise, Wicker stumbled. Less then gracfully he stood straight and looked across the pillar. Bigger then he imagined he now had full veiw of what was presented to him.

He stood in the middle, eyes closed and a look of serene bliss upon his face. He held his arm up, and brandished a baton in the other. It seemed to have a saintly air to it, a bit distasteful in Wickers own opinion but it seemed to only reveal truths.
Around him there were faces. Blank ones, ghost-like and ethereal. They just stood around him, each holding a different instrument, an orchestra of spirits. sat at the bottom the mural were three other figures, drinking from a single bottle of wine centered among them, the lable on the bottle was blank apart from a single heart. A banner was spead across the top. Musical notes decorated it and Wicker scolled across it, playing the notes in his head as he went, and quietly singing them as he went. He smiled to himself. It was the most beutiful piece he had read, but it was incomplete.

He then heard, or at least thought a voice whisper through the darkness. He turned, unable to sense where it was coming from. It seemed to want him to play somthing. A mixture of fear at the sound of the sudden voice and a dutiful sense to never fail an audiance caused him to whip out his baton, Sylvian and conduct as though he was towards an orchestra playing the piece depicted on the gimmering mural. This may have seemed strange but given the magical nature of the baton, and the trippy nature of this aparent dream it was worth a shot.

[nascent]

(OOC: Sorry it's taken me so long to get back to this. I've been having erratic problems with my internet connection, leaving me randomly unable to connect. Hopefully I'll be able to fix it soon.)


With each gesture of Sylvian, a spark of light erupted in the darkness beyond the pillar... and from these echoed music. Gentle, hauntingly beautiful music... something ethereal and soulful, ghastly and graceful, gentle and powerful all harmonized into one. The lights flickered and danced in unison with the song... and one by one each tiny became a shard of colored glass.

And then, when the music stopped, incomplete... the shards began to move. As though guided by an invisible hand they assembled, fitting with one another and forming a single immense treble cleft.

Well played... but it is not yet complete.

Neither are you.

In the distance a ray of light descended from somewhere infinitely far above and illuminated yet another large ornate pillar. Almost at the same time, the treble cleft came to rest upon the edge of the pillar Wicker stood upon, laying itself out as a ramp leading to the newly revealed destination.

The path ahead is a long one. Many stages await... and many tribulations.

Of darkness, light, and music... your grand tour has only just begun.

Press forward...

[[ASSIGNMENT: All right, I think you're ready for your first training exercise. This is meant to test both your own creativity and your character's adaptability, so read carefully.

This is a strategic thinking exercise I like to call "the Obstacle Course". In your next post, your objective is to get Wicker from where he is now to the next Awakening pillar via the path revealed by the light. Of course, it's not as simple as just walking there... oh no, not even close.

Along the path, "randomly" generated hazards and the occasional enemy will emerge to get in Wicker's way and put him in danger. It's up to you, the writer, to both make this interesting and challenging for yourself.

Your next post will be evaluated on the following criteria:

• Minimum 900 words (It's a long path, after all. Remember that it's in the shape of a treble cleft, with all the loops and gaps.)
  
• Minimum of 8 Hazards (Here's the list of Hazards: random eruptions of fire, ice covering the path, fast-freezing rain, blinding fog, blinding light, ball lightning, poisonous cloud, quicksand-like pool of darkness, deep hole, stone spikes {from beneath the path or from above, still or projectile}, miniature earthquake, walls closing in, giant spiderweb, attack by a Heartless (you choose what type), or invent one or two of your own! Also, you can have repeating Hazards -- up to three repeats per Hazard -- as long as the repeats are spaced out somewhat.)
  
• Creativity [30 pts] (Be as inventive as you can here. I'm looking for not just how you overcome the Hazards on the path, but also how you describe and interpret the Hazards.)
  
• Tacticality [30 pts] (Try not to just cut your way through any Hazard that gets in your way. This goes back to the creativity expectation.)
  
• Utilizing your Environment [40 pts] (Your surroundings be mindful of, Yoda say. The path is decently wide, but drops into an endless abyss if you step off. Also, keep in mind the shape of a treble cleft as you plot your course:
  
  Try to use these aspects to your advantage if possible. Sometimes a Hazard can present an opportunity or a dynamic that your character can take advantage of. Keep this in mind.)
  
• Spell-Check Yourself (If you're using the newest version of Firefox it'll let you know when you write something it doesn't recognize. If you're not using Firefox, typing your post up in Word or Open Office will work just as well. Up to five points [-5 pts] can be taken off your total score if the spelling is consistently problematic.)

100 - 91 pts = A
90 - 81 pts = B
80 - 66 pts = C
65- 51 pts = D
50 or lower = training failed

Bonus points can be added in for exemplary RPing, which basically comes down to impressing me with what you write. Take as much time as you need and try to have fun with this - it's a chance for your character to really show off what he's capable of. And remember that you only need to get to the end of the path, not necessarily cut down every Heartless that comes after you.

Ready... set... GO!)

[starcadius]

Wicker looked curiously at treble cleft in front of him. It spoke, that was odd. It also glowed, which was odd too.
Dream or not he decided it would be better just to roll with it and see how things go, because it was all very inspiring at the moment.
He took his first step towards the pathway that the cleft had just molded out of itself, seeing it snake and turn at the most inconvenient angles imaginable.
'Well, here goes I guess.' He muttered as he stepped onto the odd bridge.
He was only two steps in when he was first encountered with an unfathomably annoying occurrence.
The path in front of him quickly froze and Wicker, only just realizing he had stepped foot on the cold surface, let his foot slide over the smooth ice and quite literally slid head over heels down the lower tail of the cleft, which now seemed to be inclined at a steep angle. He looked behind him and saw that he was close to sliding right off the edge. The ice ended but the momentum still kept him flying towards the edge. He pulled out Sylvian and stabbed it into the centre of the tail before he fell off the edge. He lay across the tip, his feet just dangling over the edge.
'Oh really, now!?' Wicker exclaimed.
He pulled himself in and then up, dislodging Sylvian from the pathway, which was noticeably soft, and dusting himself off before sheathing the baton on looking towards the main body of the treble cleft. The ice had disappeared and he had to climb back up the tail if he were to get back where he started.
He started the trek, it was not far but it was still quite steep, and he was wary of future ice traps. Luckily, no such ice appeared and as Wicker stared back toward the pillar he was aiming for. He took a breath and stepped forward. The logical choice would be to go down the straight, short path. Deceiving or not, he wanted to get this over with.
He took a few steps forward, slowly at first, then moving quicker and progressing at a bold and steady pace. He smiled t himself, although the ice was very daunting the rest of the journey had proved uneventful and there were no other traps in sight. If he could indeed see that is...
A thick fog creped its way into Wickers vision. It came steadily at first, hardly noticeable before fully enveloping his eyes and producing nothing but purgatory void in front of him. He walked a few steps and stopped. Obviously, it would be suicide walking in this fog; he could fall off the edge. Wicker decided against waiting it out, and he knelt down to peer ahead. He could still see the floor in front of him, and that was something. He lowered himself onto his front and crawled. He felt like he was being degraded, but it was better safe then sorry. He felt around him, watching for the edges and hoping that he’d near the end soon. The fog had almost completely taken over the area and he could only make out what was directly in front of him, even his hands started to disappear.
But he soldiered on and with a sickening lurch he yelped as the adrenaline of falling over took him. He grabbed on to the edge before dropping and felt ground against his feet. He tried to lower himself but it revealed itself to be pointed. Sharp enough to kill. Surprised at how the cleft had managed to produce it, he pulled himself up again. He then heard the footsteps. Oh the footsteps...
He pulled his torso over the edge and looked around. He saw a dash of darkness and something hit him. He fell down the hole once more, surviving on a fingernail, as one would say.
He once again pulled himself up, quickly this time and spun around himself, brandishing his baton and trying to make out what it was that attacked him. Once again it hit him, and cutting through his shirt into his skin he had the most obvious epiphany. It had to be a very lucid dream to be able to feel pain properly. Now fighting for his life, he only managed to glimpse the creature as it grappled onto him and pushed him to the edge. They fell and wickers head was dangling over the edge and he had to lift his head to see what it was trying to maul his beautiful face of as he kept it at bay with both hands. In a burst of desperation Wicker flipped the dark heartless behind him into the pit. Not bothering to look down at the screaming beast, its wail hurting his ears. He flipped Sylvian and swiped at the pit, quick to finish of the foul thing. It was then he felt like an absolute fool. As the ghostly flame incinerated the pathetic creature the fog separated for its light. Elated he turned the flames around Sylvian and held it out as a torch, the path around him seeming clearer, and a much wider range of vision. He walked at a quick pace, and seeing the fog thin he sped up more. As he emerged from the white blanket he came to a startling realization, he hadn’t moved any more then a few inches.
Angered, he marched down the cleft and as he was halfway to his destination he was stopped dead in his tracks as a flame roared up in front of him, like a pillar of orange... flames. He took a step back, and examined the path in front of him. It was a gauntlet, an assault course of deathly proportions. He could see singe marks where flames would prop up. In interest he took a fob watch from his pocket. It was broken; he had smashed it earlier when he fell down ungracefully from a flight of stairs. He threw it through the air and watched as it sailed through the flames that seemed to lick at it in fury. Being metal it was only blacked but as it kept going he saw that it was blown to pieces as a ball of lightning struck it. He seemed to have set of a trigger, as the obstacles seemed to turn on and off at a rhythmic pace, as though it intended to challenge and not kill. He remembered an old trick that thieves used when confronted by obstacles such as this. They would work out a rhythm and dance their way through. Silly and possibly untrue but it seemed the only logical way as he was in no way quick enough or agile enough to avoid them properly, it would be suicide either way, and since there was nothing but that dashing mural of him n the pillar he came from he decided to press on. He knew how to waltz and such, but he’d have to improvise. He timed his step across the flames and spun, his back burning with the heat, but otherwise undamaged. He then ducked as the ball of lightning flew over head. But just as he was coming to roll forward out of the way, ore ice. His roll turned into a skid which was carrying him towards the end. Good, he though. Until of course the floor near the end raised up and bore spikes at him. Unable to stop, Wicker just spread his legs and tried too stop himself by halting him before he hit the spikes. This was futile, and he shut tight his eyes as the impending doom came nearer. He felt a sudden stop and buckled. He opened his eyes and stared in amazement. His legs had managed to stop on the parts of the spike wall/floor/thing that wasn’t covered by a spike and one said spike was precariously and violently near to his crotch. The ice melted (good for the heat his back had just experienced but a bit damp) and the spikes retracted and the floor went back down. He got up and jumped onto the other pillar, rather then walk it. He had enough of obstacles and he turned to face the cleft.
‘What the hell was that for?’

[nascent]

(OOC: Your writing is fairly good, though at points seemed a little rushed and disoriented. If I may make a suggestion: it really helps to go back and read out loud what you've written, as this is an excellent way to catch minor issues and slip-ups before posting. Otherwise, your first exercise was a solid success!

Here's the breakdown of your grade:

Minimum 900 words: Exceeded
Minimum of 8 Hazards: Met
Creativity: 22pts
[While I feel that you could have put a bit more into the Hazards creatively, your efforts in this domain were clear nonetheless. I like what you did with the fog-Heartless-spike pit incident in particular -- rather epic survival drama in flavor, that.]
Tacticality: 25pts
[Realizing that you had limited options to work with, your character attempted to make the most of what was on hand. Highlights: the shattered watch (though that did seem a bit convenient, it was still believable) and crawling underneath the fog.]
Using Your Environment: 20pts
[Your character was given a most unusual path to walk -- when I do this exercise it is usually just a ramp in the shape of a right angle, but given that this is taking place inside Wicker's heart I figured something with a bit more flair was called for. That being said, you did a passable job using his surroundings -- nothing spectacular, but it met the basic requirements.]

FINAL GRADE:
67pts (C)

Overall Critique:
[Take your time when you write, and a lot of the small mistakes that trip you up will just evaporate. If it helps, run your posts through Word or OpenOffice to check spelling and grammar before putting them up. You have the potential to be a skilled and inventive RP writer, so don't give up.]

And now... for the next event!)

Bravo, noble performer.

You have within you the brave waltz, just as you bear the supportive concerto.

The performance, however, is not over yet...

This new pillar upon which Wicker had arrived was not half so welcoming as the last. The light coming up through the stained glass seemed, somehow, to be dimmer... colder, even vaguely menacing. As the path of the stained glass cleft vanished behind him, that dull light became just a little bit brighter... enough to reveal the dread-inducing artwork that dominated the surface of the platform.

Where the last had memorialized all that the young musician cherished... this pillar was an effigy of fear. The images here were forbidding, nightmare-like in their disposition. It was like a window into the darkest parts of Wicker's heart... the fears etched cruelly upon the platform were his fears.

Unnoticed, the young conductor's shadow had begun to lengthen behind him... in fact, it spilled over the edge of the platform like flowing water and then separated itself from him entirely. In the dark it stirred, taking on new shape and new strength for several moments before it began to crawl... slowly, steadily... back up the side of the pillar.

Search the depths of your heart for music.

Your nocturne is about to begin.

(OOC: Before you proceed to the next challenge, I'd like you to describe the images on the pillar from Wicker's perspective. If you hadn't already guessed, I'm using these as a character building exercise.

After that, Wicker's shadow is going to crawl back up and meet her, equipped with its own dark duplicate of Sylvian. The basic concept is that Wicker will be fighting a Heartless in his own likeness, just like Anti-Sora from KH1. Your goal is to have Wicker fight his doppelganger... and if possible, defeat it.

The expectations are similar to before:

• Minimum 1400 words
  
• Creativity [20 pts]
  
• Tacticality [20 pts]
  
• Utilizing your Environment [20 pts]
  
• Recreating your character's Fighting Style [30 pts]
  [This is really key to this exercise. The point is for you, as a writer, to figure out your character's strengths and weaknesses in one-on-one combat and develop ways to adapt. This goes back to what I wrote regarding the Tactical Triune in 'Deeds of the Writers'.]
  
• The Shadows Are Watching... [10 pts]
  [Wicker's doppelganger will start out with very simple, almost primal Heartless behavior -- aggressive, but not very smart. As the fight goes on it will begin to learn from him, approximating his abilities and thinking. Towards the fight's end the shadow will be trying to out-think Wicker using what it's learned of him, thus becoming a much more dangerous opponent. I need you to do your best to recreate this learning behavior in your opponent's actions.]
  
• Spell-Check Yourself

100 - 91 pts = A
90 - 81 pts = B
80 - 66 pts = C
65- 51 pts = D
50 or lower = training failed

Bonus points can be added in for exemplary RPing, just like before. Best of luck!)